the girl
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She's the girl who sits and watches while others live a charmed life. The girl loves to write but doesn't know if she's any good at it. She loves rainbow sprinkled ice cream on a rainy day. She loves to take walks with the wind blowing. Giggling should be made a career. She tells you her secrets in not so many words.
in the past
blog pokes
well-known pokes
Monday, May 28, 2007 9:14 PM
blink-of-the-eye bleach & softener.
I fidget with the hem of my shorts. Folding the edges into pretty white pleats is distraction enough. So, I fold and fold like an expert tailor but then there's no more to fold and I'm left staring nervously at the blaring screen. MyPride it says and I think, it isn't even a fraction of my pride and yet they made me declare it as part of it every time I speak of work. It is so very unfair and I vow to name the next addition to the household, MyDreamy. You got to admit that it sounds more original than blindly copying McDreamy. That brief thought allowed me my 15 seconds smile.
And just as it came, it went.
It was all over the group of college people. It's out, she tells me and when I look at her numbly, she says urgently, It's really out!
I couldn't bring myself to sign my name for the library computers. Excuse? The library is too cold; physically and emotionally. You would think that when I got home, I would have ran to MyDoxy (yes lah, I'm renaming my laptop) to check but no, I sat myself down in front of the telly laughing my heart out as a Taiwanese soap actress does her best to hide the fact that she's a girl studying at a boys' school.
If only I could put it off by trying to fold the hems of my tee. But that won't do. The monster is out of the dungeon and no amount of expert persuasion will get it to lock itself away.
It would have been a pretty rainy day.
Theory after theory have been shoved in front of the eye. The brain reads, all the while exam-oriented but here and there the heart tugs violently with unlikely questions.
Could it be? It sounds likely. Are you pretty darn sure?
Could I be blamed then that I have this overwhelming desire to scream, up and fly away to Never Never Land to share a gazillion scoops of White Chocolate Gelato with Peter? Oh, if he'll only have me.
It was a decision that went against all the yells and pleas of the heart. It was obvious that it definitely was NOT me. But I went ahead, for want of security. So much for security. Regretting isn't at the top of my to-do list but the unsightly monster drags me to it every time I close my eyes. It taunts me, telling me that I really shouldn't have. It's much too late to go back and do as the heart dictated.
Is there a bleach for blink-of-the-eye images? Will you get me some softener while you're at it?
And just as it came, it went.
It was all over the group of college people. It's out, she tells me and when I look at her numbly, she says urgently, It's really out!
I couldn't bring myself to sign my name for the library computers. Excuse? The library is too cold; physically and emotionally. You would think that when I got home, I would have ran to MyDoxy (yes lah, I'm renaming my laptop) to check but no, I sat myself down in front of the telly laughing my heart out as a Taiwanese soap actress does her best to hide the fact that she's a girl studying at a boys' school.
If only I could put it off by trying to fold the hems of my tee. But that won't do. The monster is out of the dungeon and no amount of expert persuasion will get it to lock itself away.
It would have been a pretty rainy day.
- It rained in the morning. =))
- We drooled on Al Pacino's acting and later analyzed him. Okay, analyze his charater.
- I was disclipined enough to shiver in the freezing library and finish on Allport and Cattell (personality theorists) for tomorrow's discussion in Human Personality.
- I had Mammee Monster! *beams*
- I spoke to the Daddums about roads and highways and flyovers and actually knew what I was talking about. *shinebeams*
- The Daddums and I got to walk in the rain. Ohsocool.
Theory after theory have been shoved in front of the eye. The brain reads, all the while exam-oriented but here and there the heart tugs violently with unlikely questions.
Could it be? It sounds likely. Are you pretty darn sure?
Could I be blamed then that I have this overwhelming desire to scream, up and fly away to Never Never Land to share a gazillion scoops of White Chocolate Gelato with Peter? Oh, if he'll only have me.
It was a decision that went against all the yells and pleas of the heart. It was obvious that it definitely was NOT me. But I went ahead, for want of security. So much for security. Regretting isn't at the top of my to-do list but the unsightly monster drags me to it every time I close my eyes. It taunts me, telling me that I really shouldn't have. It's much too late to go back and do as the heart dictated.
Is there a bleach for blink-of-the-eye images? Will you get me some softener while you're at it?
minx wrote at9:14 PM
1 replies
1 replies
Sunday, May 20, 2007 7:46 PM
happy belated 21st sweetheart.
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I'm ecstatic she's happy. I love it that she loved it. I know that's my cue to get the hell out of her life.Haha.
And so that's what I'm trying to do.
minx wrote at7:46 PM
Thursday, May 10, 2007 11:38 PM
lets take that spaceship ride you promised.
Sometimes when the Earth seems like the last place you would like to inhabit, some things show you that it isn't so bad after all.
Just when you're convinced you could live through it, a song with the stupidest chorus gets airtime during prime time over a radio station that boasts great music all day. But to counter the awful imagery that gets graffitied in your mind (no thanks to "...it's better to be the owner of a lonely heart than a broken heart"), you manage a clean cut on one of the busiest lanes around.
Soon after the mad cows are out of the farm and you nearly knock into a Beamer and a Benz, so you make a mental note to list reasons for a chauffeur only to smile at your mother's remark that the driver in the other car allowed you entry only because she held up her hand while smiling. A debate ensues if the driver allowed entry because the driver in our car was too hot not to or because of her beautiful *cough*sister*cough* smiled at him. How's Earth so far? Okay, I guess.
Wait. Earth loss a point. The bookstore you've been dying to set foot into fails to stock up on beautifully authored books. Bummer. Earth, however, manages a comeback. It's policy for this wonderfulcoollovely bookstore to refund contras in amount when an exchange is done. No other bookstore or store in the Universe does this. Earth is home =)
Not so fast, homie. It is on this planet too that the cries are the loudest for pains that could not be pictured by stringing a few adjectives in a sentence even if one possesses the most profound vocabulary. One such cry is forever loud and present daily in your life. A cry that you can't stand hearing only because it's pains pierce through your heart and mind the moment it registers in your auditory functions.
Then you see a picture perfect moment that convinces you that your address on Earth could never be replaced with a post code in Venus even if they declare you Queen and gave you gifts in the form of every single digital and film photography equipment ever made.
Earth it is, pretty things, Earth it is. =))
Just when you're convinced you could live through it, a song with the stupidest chorus gets airtime during prime time over a radio station that boasts great music all day. But to counter the awful imagery that gets graffitied in your mind (no thanks to "...it's better to be the owner of a lonely heart than a broken heart"), you manage a clean cut on one of the busiest lanes around.
Soon after the mad cows are out of the farm and you nearly knock into a Beamer and a Benz, so you make a mental note to list reasons for a chauffeur only to smile at your mother's remark that the driver in the other car allowed you entry only because she held up her hand while smiling. A debate ensues if the driver allowed entry because the driver in our car was too hot not to or because of her beautiful *cough*sister*cough* smiled at him. How's Earth so far? Okay, I guess.
Wait. Earth loss a point. The bookstore you've been dying to set foot into fails to stock up on beautifully authored books. Bummer. Earth, however, manages a comeback. It's policy for this wonderfulcoollovely bookstore to refund contras in amount when an exchange is done. No other bookstore or store in the Universe does this. Earth is home =)
Not so fast, homie. It is on this planet too that the cries are the loudest for pains that could not be pictured by stringing a few adjectives in a sentence even if one possesses the most profound vocabulary. One such cry is forever loud and present daily in your life. A cry that you can't stand hearing only because it's pains pierce through your heart and mind the moment it registers in your auditory functions.
Then you see a picture perfect moment that convinces you that your address on Earth could never be replaced with a post code in Venus even if they declare you Queen and gave you gifts in the form of every single digital and film photography equipment ever made.
Earth it is, pretty things, Earth it is. =))
minx wrote at11:38 PM
4 replies
4 replies
Saturday, May 05, 2007 3:05 AM
trade me if you dare.
There are things that you would never trade with even if you had a chance to make the most profitable arrangement possible. You won't place bets on it because it's simply too risky. It may not seem that whatever you are in possession of is of that much importance, even to you. So, it's there every time all the time, sometimes annoyingly troublesome and yet you never give it up. You do the most ridiculous things to satisfy. You come up with mind-numbing insults to fight fire with fire and yet you never let it leave your sight.
Your mother says you're mad to do what you do. She says it's the love you have for it. That explanation seems too simplified for your liking so you say "Nahhhh!" and show her your tongue to which she painfully attempts to return. Then you run away, hoping she never gets to her biased praises.
Then you think and try to come up with viable exchanges for it. I mean it has got to be worth something or rather right? When you think you've got it, and announce that you would more than gladly accept an exchange if it's as good as your thought- up trade. But when it comes right down to it, will you go through with it?
Are you willing to give it all up and accept that you'll never have it again?
Will memories of it suffice?
I'm sure there is something everyone has that they would never trade anything for. Even for all the white chocolate in the world or if you fancy, money in the world.
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Your perfectly aligned three =)
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Your mother says you're mad to do what you do. She says it's the love you have for it. That explanation seems too simplified for your liking so you say "Nahhhh!" and show her your tongue to which she painfully attempts to return. Then you run away, hoping she never gets to her biased praises.
Then you think and try to come up with viable exchanges for it. I mean it has got to be worth something or rather right? When you think you've got it, and announce that you would more than gladly accept an exchange if it's as good as your thought- up trade. But when it comes right down to it, will you go through with it?
Are you willing to give it all up and accept that you'll never have it again?
Will memories of it suffice?
I'm sure there is something everyone has that they would never trade anything for. Even for all the white chocolate in the world or if you fancy, money in the world.
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Your perfectly aligned three =).jpg)
I'd trade just about anything not to lose it.
minx wrote at3:05 AM
2 replies
2 replies
Tuesday, May 01, 2007 12:06 PM
sick, birthday, dreams and yesterday.
I. Am. Sick.
I think its TTG's entry's fault. Eh, girl, did you infect your post with your virus ah? My throat has been hurting since yesterday. Last night it developed into a fullblown fever and a massive headache. Thank the Heavens for medications or I wouldn't have been able to sleep. Arghargh. It isn't so bad now, just a scratchy throat and flu to deal with.
. . . . .
It's the biological sister's birthday today but she doesn't have a package to tear open. And why? Because she discovered her present way way before I could have nicely wrap it. She poked her head into my bag, so its not my fault.
The girl turns 17 today =) I can't wait for her to take over chauffeur duty. Yes, I am sick of driving on KL roads but shh! don't tell her that people drive like mad cows in KL because she's mighty happy about kicking me off the driver's seat. Hehe.
Sadly, you guys don't get to see what she looks like 'cause she's camera shy. She has a green belt in silat so that rules out using physical force to get her to look into my phone. People seem to think we look alike, personally, I think that's what people say when introduced to siblings. They get weirded out after the usual "hello, I'm so and so..." so they say, "eh, you guys look like each other!". That's what I'm sticking to until someone can properly identify what makes us look alike with proof for backup.
Hehe.
. . . . .
I miss doing all stuff journalism related. Yesterday, I had to confirm a big fat "no" for something I really really really wanted to say "YES" to. Darnnit. I hate saying no. I always avoid it as best I can but this time there was really no other way to it. I hate disappointing. darnnitdarnnit.
It isn't a problem to look for a replacement but it was sweet nonetheless that my being there was important to him. I always thought that my presence was more like a burden that he shoulders 'cause God knows I'm a klutz and so mistakes are forever present. I mean wouldn't you be happy if the weak link in your team confirms a 'no'? Lesser things to stress about right? Better performance outcome right?
If before I admired him for his work, the progress he made in his career at his age, now I look up to him even more. Sure, he has his moments when stress takes over and reduces him into wrinkled eyebrows, heavy eyebags and harsh words but that's because he's uber stressed and so it is forgivable. He is human after all.
He's been encouraging when I thought I couldn't write for nuts and when I had to leave 'the New York Times's pantry coffee' idea in the realm of dreams. I still think I don't write as well as one should but he's determined that there's been a huge improvement.
This isn't a declaration of love, it's one of respect and awe. =)
. . . . .
A few pictures from yesterday.
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Tools of the night.
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Mine.
.jpg)
Ours.
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See lah, the poser cannot resist including his hand in the picture. *shakes head*
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WARNING: Expectant mothers? Really?! The Jangan Pandang Belakang poster.
At the end of the night, I sounded like the automated voice you hear when you're done ordering your pizza over the phone. Think: chirpy thank you. lol.
Oh, and I experimented a tad. Psych talk, sorry. Two experimental conditions: (1) courteous and smiley reception, (2) courteous but directive reception. The conditions were counterbalanced. Hehe. Results: in condition (1) if the patron is in an angry mood, he/she takes advantage and raises voice or pretends to be above the law. However in condition (2) the angry patrons follow the rules but the co-operative patrons did not enjoy this. Hehe. Research (phoey!) relevant to customer service relations. Mwahaha.
I think its TTG's entry's fault. Eh, girl, did you infect your post with your virus ah? My throat has been hurting since yesterday. Last night it developed into a fullblown fever and a massive headache. Thank the Heavens for medications or I wouldn't have been able to sleep. Arghargh. It isn't so bad now, just a scratchy throat and flu to deal with.
. . . . .
It's the biological sister's birthday today but she doesn't have a package to tear open. And why? Because she discovered her present way way before I could have nicely wrap it. She poked her head into my bag, so its not my fault.
The girl turns 17 today =) I can't wait for her to take over chauffeur duty. Yes, I am sick of driving on KL roads but shh! don't tell her that people drive like mad cows in KL because she's mighty happy about kicking me off the driver's seat. Hehe.
Sadly, you guys don't get to see what she looks like 'cause she's camera shy. She has a green belt in silat so that rules out using physical force to get her to look into my phone. People seem to think we look alike, personally, I think that's what people say when introduced to siblings. They get weirded out after the usual "hello, I'm so and so..." so they say, "eh, you guys look like each other!". That's what I'm sticking to until someone can properly identify what makes us look alike with proof for backup.
Hehe.
. . . . .
I miss doing all stuff journalism related. Yesterday, I had to confirm a big fat "no" for something I really really really wanted to say "YES" to. Darnnit. I hate saying no. I always avoid it as best I can but this time there was really no other way to it. I hate disappointing. darnnitdarnnit.
It isn't a problem to look for a replacement but it was sweet nonetheless that my being there was important to him. I always thought that my presence was more like a burden that he shoulders 'cause God knows I'm a klutz and so mistakes are forever present. I mean wouldn't you be happy if the weak link in your team confirms a 'no'? Lesser things to stress about right? Better performance outcome right?
If before I admired him for his work, the progress he made in his career at his age, now I look up to him even more. Sure, he has his moments when stress takes over and reduces him into wrinkled eyebrows, heavy eyebags and harsh words but that's because he's uber stressed and so it is forgivable. He is human after all.
He's been encouraging when I thought I couldn't write for nuts and when I had to leave 'the New York Times's pantry coffee' idea in the realm of dreams. I still think I don't write as well as one should but he's determined that there's been a huge improvement.
This isn't a declaration of love, it's one of respect and awe. =)
. . . . .
A few pictures from yesterday.
.jpg)
.jpg)
Tools of the night..jpg)
Mine..jpg)
Ours..jpg)
See lah, the poser cannot resist including his hand in the picture. *shakes head*.jpg)
WARNING: Expectant mothers? Really?! The Jangan Pandang Belakang poster.At the end of the night, I sounded like the automated voice you hear when you're done ordering your pizza over the phone. Think: chirpy thank you. lol.
Oh, and I experimented a tad. Psych talk, sorry. Two experimental conditions: (1) courteous and smiley reception, (2) courteous but directive reception. The conditions were counterbalanced. Hehe. Results: in condition (1) if the patron is in an angry mood, he/she takes advantage and raises voice or pretends to be above the law. However in condition (2) the angry patrons follow the rules but the co-operative patrons did not enjoy this. Hehe. Research (phoey!) relevant to customer service relations. Mwahaha.
minx wrote at12:06 PM
4 replies
4 replies