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She's the girl who sits and watches while others live a charmed life. The girl loves to write but doesn't know if she's any good at it. She loves rainbow sprinkled ice cream on a rainy day. She loves to take walks with the wind blowing. Giggling should be made a career. She tells you her secrets in not so many words.

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    • Monday, July 16, 2007 7:59 PM

    mangled hearts and pretty brown eyes.









    . . . . .

    I blame it on the way the iPod earphones are so great it feels as if you're listening to the band live. I blame it on the way mirrors are everywhere and staring into them is inevitable. I blame it on how I am doing tasks for high school students. I blame it on being so high up that I'm constantly tempted to do multiple bungee jumps running through the windows.

    Maybe it's the play list on the iPod. Or maybe its the excess idle moments while on the job. It could also be the bookworm/music lover lunch breaks. Funny how it could be so many things and yet its revolving around a select two.

    There's the way you look right through me. Calling even when I'm walking right at you. Smiling when you really don't feel like it. Declining because you can't but yearning desperately. Crossing your fingers for it to get worse in the hopes of getting better.

    Better safe than sorry, that's what I hear over and over again. I thought it was clear as day; it's nothing. It's not real. It's what I've painted in my mind's eye. And only mine at that. So why when I've mutilated it beyond saving, the careful speech comes up. I had confirmation. I have confirmation.     Even if it's reciprocated, I can't have it. I won't. I don't do very well in shadows. Confusion folds me in its tight embrace. Ironically, I feel comforted within its folds. Thoughts fade away faster than I can hold on to it because of one's expert advice. Things are great the way it is, I'm just bracing myself for the eventual when leaving is the only thing left for it. Must everyone leave?
    ~ that one in the past made all in the future impossible.

    I don't need clarification, I need assurance.


    minx wrote at7:59 PM