the girl
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She's the girl who sits and watches while others live a charmed life. The girl loves to write but doesn't know if she's any good at it. She loves rainbow sprinkled ice cream on a rainy day. She loves to take walks with the wind blowing. Giggling should be made a career. She tells you her secrets in not so many words.
in the past
blog pokes
well-known pokes
Friday, August 31, 2007 3:07 AM
we're 50!
In the midst of very disturbing issues plaguing the country and her nation, we celebrate her independence day. It seems as if we never budged from where we were 50 years ago, mentally at least. Actually maybe our mindsets were in better shape then as compared to now. Everyone is rattling on about how bad things are and what not but all I can think of is the peace I feel just listening to Tanggal 31 as it is aired in between songs with not so subtle sexual themes.
Although there were countdowns and fireworks everywehere, my eve was spent at home minus the traffic. There's really nothing like curling up with a book on the floor near the sofa where the Daddums sits moving his leg to the song beats and occasionally nodding off. I'm just grateful that that moment was possible.
As screwed up as things are and as much as we need to work on things, it is a Happy Merdeka that we greet each other. Let's hope today reminds us that we're all in this together and together we shall strive to build and mend.
Have a great one!
Although there were countdowns and fireworks everywehere, my eve was spent at home minus the traffic. There's really nothing like curling up with a book on the floor near the sofa where the Daddums sits moving his leg to the song beats and occasionally nodding off. I'm just grateful that that moment was possible.
As screwed up as things are and as much as we need to work on things, it is a Happy Merdeka that we greet each other. Let's hope today reminds us that we're all in this together and together we shall strive to build and mend.
Have a great one! minx wrote at3:07 AM
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Tuesday, August 28, 2007 11:37 AM
that do.
It's the rain that we walked through. It's the silly hold-your-pee moments so more seeing could be squeezed in. It's the one regular coke and fries with five right hands digging in. It's the persuading of the legs to climb the many flights of stairs. It's the laughing at not-so-funny-also things because we felt like being a riot.
That was what the Bangsar-do was for me.
When some bailed out but others extended self invites just so things don't get canceled, I could only smile.
When I was shirt-off-my-back-broke and others fought to be my personal bank (complete with installments and interest-free loans), I worried about my spending. Heh.
And when you're so worried, you gulp down your milo ais then receive calls and texts checking to see if you're okay, your day looks up. =)
The drama award of the day has got to go to Ameza for her 'helpitwon'tcomeoff' little scene. She was running from one person to the next in her socks. As sadistic as it sounds, if only I have a video of it. Sadly, the sales assistants were way too edgy with a camera being in the premises. Ah well, they were only doing their jobs.
Thanks babes.
That was what the Bangsar-do was for me.
When some bailed out but others extended self invites just so things don't get canceled, I could only smile.When I was shirt-off-my-back-broke and others fought to be my personal bank (complete with installments and interest-free loans), I worried about my spending. Heh.
And when you're so worried, you gulp down your milo ais then receive calls and texts checking to see if you're okay, your day looks up. =)
The drama award of the day has got to go to Ameza for her 'helpitwon'tcomeoff' little scene. She was running from one person to the next in her socks. As sadistic as it sounds, if only I have a video of it. Sadly, the sales assistants were way too edgy with a camera being in the premises. Ah well, they were only doing their jobs.
Thanks babes. minx wrote at11:37 AM
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1 replies
Sunday, August 26, 2007 11:44 PM
running is fun!
The idea of doing 3km on foot would normally terrify, petrify and anything else that rhymes with that. I don't even remember how I got myself into it.
Aim: Not to come in last
Strategy: Eat healthy and walk a lot (sure not?)
Secret: Run with your two favorite people
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My stamina is so bad that I had envisioned running to a deserted finish line. Read: number tags flying with the wind, empty drink cans littered everywhere. But I have to admit the run didn't seem as far as I had pictured it in my mind. We reached the finish quite early and I got a hug from BigMiloMan =)
I guess the sandwich and juice lunch as well as the walks to and from KLCC paid off a little. And people, running in a baju kurung isn't as hard as it looks! I bet you did it all the time in school right? On the other hand, I can't say the same for the dhoti. Heh. Chapati-man had quite a number of flasher moments during the run.
ps: to the two pei chek darlings, i sayang you! sorry for slowing you guys down and thanks for making 3km seem like 500m =))
Aim: Not to come in last
Strategy: Eat healthy and walk a lot (sure not?)
Secret: Run with your two favorite people
.jpg)
My stamina is so bad that I had envisioned running to a deserted finish line. Read: number tags flying with the wind, empty drink cans littered everywhere. But I have to admit the run didn't seem as far as I had pictured it in my mind. We reached the finish quite early and I got a hug from BigMiloMan =)I guess the sandwich and juice lunch as well as the walks to and from KLCC paid off a little. And people, running in a baju kurung isn't as hard as it looks! I bet you did it all the time in school right? On the other hand, I can't say the same for the dhoti. Heh. Chapati-man had quite a number of flasher moments during the run.
ps: to the two pei chek darlings, i sayang you! sorry for slowing you guys down and thanks for making 3km seem like 500m =))
minx wrote at11:44 PM
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0 replies
Saturday, August 25, 2007 11:41 PM
who's gon' watch you...
It's the little things that strike you sometimes and you find yourself lost in a flurry blur of things. It catches you in mid-sentence, freezing your words, crystallizing your thoughts and therefore rendering you helpless. You seem to need to catch up but all you feel like doing is sitting cross-legged on the sidewalk of a busy street, determined not to budge. So what if it sounds crazy? So what if its unheard of? Sometimes all that matters is your heart's desire; however mental it may seem.
But what if what you want and what has to be done will not sign a peace treaty?
And what if you're suspended in the middle of torture but your screams are cleverly masked with silence?
That's when you decide whoopeedoo. let's go hysterical! Because the Blues are afraid of weird, mental thoughts and ideas. Heh.
If only you would sit with me and listen to my heart's whispers, hug them close and draw sad smileys in the sand with me.
But what if what you want and what has to be done will not sign a peace treaty?
And what if you're suspended in the middle of torture but your screams are cleverly masked with silence?
That's when you decide whoopeedoo. let's go hysterical! Because the Blues are afraid of weird, mental thoughts and ideas. Heh.
If only you would sit with me and listen to my heart's whispers, hug them close and draw sad smileys in the sand with me. minx wrote at11:41 PM
Thursday, August 23, 2007 9:20 AM
ctrl-alt-del.
My favorite carpet is the red with black trimmings at the waiting area opposite the board room. My favorite view has got to be the one overlooking KLCC, the National Library and the quaint bungalow houses from the pantry windows. But still while walking to the store room holding the stack of rejected photocopied documents, only questions came to mind.
Did my presence make a difference?
Was I significant enough to be missed or asked after?
Yes, the internship has finally (finally!) come to an end. It felt like any other day walking out of the offices if not for the suspicious stares at my chest simply because I didn't have a tag hanging from my neck. Perverts!
And the byes were different. Who would have thought that the 'Big Slave Driver' could loosen up. Haha.
Study hard yeah. And pay attention to everything. And most importantly make lots of money and then come see me.
That woman is scared out of her wits since the SME spokesperson spoke to her about needing nothing less than RM7mil to continue to live her current lifestyle after she retires. She tells everyone to make good money after that -_-" I must admit she paints the perfect picture of a successful corporate woman with the right principles to work and play. I can't say she taught me a lot (if anything) but watching her has given me a vague idea of what it's like.
I suppose my time here has taught me a little of everything. I'm an expert with the machines now! Fax, photocopy, shredder, electrical typewriter, binding; I do it all. Transfer calls? Leave it to me. Answer the phone? Good Morning. Citi. And company appearance in newspapers and magazines cost money! I'm lucky the whole addressing everyone as Ma'am thing didn't stick. Heh.
It sounds very generic but maybe the 30 working days was not to throw an inexperienced Psychology major into the stressful field of Corporate Communications but to allow her to observe the people and the work. 'Cause if that's the case, internship successful =) I've seen how it really is and there has been no better place to observe people, trust me! The A-types, the jokers, the hystericals, the apple-polishers, the busybodys; every one of them and more. Although this was not what I envisioned the internship to be like (I guess Star is quite an act to follow).
Funny how I can only say I'll truly miss the old school Toshiba notebook and my 'Tenant' tag. And the walks to and from KLCC. Oh and the 'sandwich-and-apple-juice-on-the-park'! Haha.
Got to give it to the colleagues though 'cause they sure know how to do their luncheons. =D Japanese at the Nikko and Dim Sum at The Royal China sure was delectable.
Pic-tu-res! Which reminds me what the 'Big Slave Driver' said.
You're taking pictures? Of what?! Next thing I see our faces right smack on the Net. =D
Look carefully =D cause it might look uber familiar to some. 'Mini Slave Driver' took it from her time at the landfill. Faster see whether it's your handwriting or not! I must say this brought smiles when days were dreary. I even found cds and invoices on the event. =))
Who knows, maybe this project was inspired by the above!
Remember our extensions so we're a call away if you need anything.
The trusty reddy that had this familiar perfume on it which I still can't quite figure out from which line.
Can you tell I'm obsessed with post-its? =) We're all born mad, some of us remain so. -Beckett-
*drumrolls* The Mexican. He wasn't too excited about the picture since it was rush hour at the Exit lines. Daddums said I was interrupting but hey, I did say I was gon' get a picture with one of them =D
APAC\tm19725 will have been deleted effective 5pm. Bye now [CMB-CORP]!
Aah, I'm gon' miss dressing up in the morning and slapping plasters all over my feet so the black peep-toe pumps don't eat my feet alive. Who'd think I'd have anything at all to miss from this time.
Did my presence make a difference?
Was I significant enough to be missed or asked after?
Yes, the internship has finally (finally!) come to an end. It felt like any other day walking out of the offices if not for the suspicious stares at my chest simply because I didn't have a tag hanging from my neck. Perverts!
And the byes were different. Who would have thought that the 'Big Slave Driver' could loosen up. Haha.
Study hard yeah. And pay attention to everything. And most importantly make lots of money and then come see me.
That woman is scared out of her wits since the SME spokesperson spoke to her about needing nothing less than RM7mil to continue to live her current lifestyle after she retires. She tells everyone to make good money after that -_-" I must admit she paints the perfect picture of a successful corporate woman with the right principles to work and play. I can't say she taught me a lot (if anything) but watching her has given me a vague idea of what it's like.
I suppose my time here has taught me a little of everything. I'm an expert with the machines now! Fax, photocopy, shredder, electrical typewriter, binding; I do it all. Transfer calls? Leave it to me. Answer the phone? Good Morning. Citi. And company appearance in newspapers and magazines cost money! I'm lucky the whole addressing everyone as Ma'am thing didn't stick. Heh.
It sounds very generic but maybe the 30 working days was not to throw an inexperienced Psychology major into the stressful field of Corporate Communications but to allow her to observe the people and the work. 'Cause if that's the case, internship successful =) I've seen how it really is and there has been no better place to observe people, trust me! The A-types, the jokers, the hystericals, the apple-polishers, the busybodys; every one of them and more. Although this was not what I envisioned the internship to be like (I guess Star is quite an act to follow).
Funny how I can only say I'll truly miss the old school Toshiba notebook and my 'Tenant' tag. And the walks to and from KLCC. Oh and the 'sandwich-and-apple-juice-on-the-park'! Haha.
Got to give it to the colleagues though 'cause they sure know how to do their luncheons. =D Japanese at the Nikko and Dim Sum at The Royal China sure was delectable.
Pic-tu-res! Which reminds me what the 'Big Slave Driver' said.
You're taking pictures? Of what?! Next thing I see our faces right smack on the Net. =D
Look carefully =D cause it might look uber familiar to some. 'Mini Slave Driver' took it from her time at the landfill. Faster see whether it's your handwriting or not! I must say this brought smiles when days were dreary. I even found cds and invoices on the event. =))
Who knows, maybe this project was inspired by the above!
Remember our extensions so we're a call away if you need anything.
The trusty reddy that had this familiar perfume on it which I still can't quite figure out from which line.
Can you tell I'm obsessed with post-its? =) We're all born mad, some of us remain so. -Beckett-
*drumrolls* The Mexican. He wasn't too excited about the picture since it was rush hour at the Exit lines. Daddums said I was interrupting but hey, I did say I was gon' get a picture with one of them =D
APAC\tm19725 will have been deleted effective 5pm. Bye now [CMB-CORP]!Aah, I'm gon' miss dressing up in the morning and slapping plasters all over my feet so the black peep-toe pumps don't eat my feet alive. Who'd think I'd have anything at all to miss from this time.
minx wrote at9:20 AM
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0 replies
Tuesday, August 14, 2007 9:44 PM
tell me your story?
She leans back with a sigh after putting in place the blue trolley she dragged up the bus. After awhile she pulls close the over-sized windbreaker with her left hand while her right continued to grip tightly to the handle of the trolley. She closes her eyes and lets out another sigh.
To me, she's that lady on the bus. The one who sat next to me throughout the entire journey so I didn't have to brave through the cold on my own. She lent me her company with occasional brushing of shoulders, grunts and sighs as she slept. She's the funny being that wore a white Punjabi suit underneath her windbreaker complete with a head scarf. That's as much as she'll ever mean to me.
But she could mean the world to another. Her loved ones could be anxiously awaiting her knock on the front door.
They could be staring out the window in the hopes of catching a glimpse of her shadow as she makes her way back home. A daughter may have been pacing around the telephone fighting with herself in trying to decide if a call to her mother's mobile is absolutely necessary. A husband may have been waiting on the sidewalk before the dark stretch of road so she wouldn't need to constantly check if there were sinister characters following behind.
In short, very much loved.
Yet, in this bus where almost forty of us cram together, she is just another lady. Another living breathing individual contributing to the squeeze. And the man who jumped with a 'Whoo!' when he found a seat, he's just another someone as well. We were all someones who were closer to each other during that 30 minute bus ride than we ever knew or will know.
How strange that there could be a whole long list of people who would give anything to have these people with them all the time and some of us can be so ignorant as to hate based purely on skin colour, nationality and even religion. The next time you think badly about that sweaty Indonesian construction worker or the messily dressed dispatch guy, think again!If there are people who could love those people with all their hearts, the least we could do is to let each prove their worth before allowing our stereotypes get into gear.
For in this world, hatred never cease by hatred; hatred cease only with love. This is the Eternal Law. -Dhammapada-
To me, she's that lady on the bus. The one who sat next to me throughout the entire journey so I didn't have to brave through the cold on my own. She lent me her company with occasional brushing of shoulders, grunts and sighs as she slept. She's the funny being that wore a white Punjabi suit underneath her windbreaker complete with a head scarf. That's as much as she'll ever mean to me.
But she could mean the world to another. Her loved ones could be anxiously awaiting her knock on the front door.
They could be staring out the window in the hopes of catching a glimpse of her shadow as she makes her way back home. A daughter may have been pacing around the telephone fighting with herself in trying to decide if a call to her mother's mobile is absolutely necessary. A husband may have been waiting on the sidewalk before the dark stretch of road so she wouldn't need to constantly check if there were sinister characters following behind.
In short, very much loved.
Yet, in this bus where almost forty of us cram together, she is just another lady. Another living breathing individual contributing to the squeeze. And the man who jumped with a 'Whoo!' when he found a seat, he's just another someone as well. We were all someones who were closer to each other during that 30 minute bus ride than we ever knew or will know.
How strange that there could be a whole long list of people who would give anything to have these people with them all the time and some of us can be so ignorant as to hate based purely on skin colour, nationality and even religion. The next time you think badly about that sweaty Indonesian construction worker or the messily dressed dispatch guy, think again!If there are people who could love those people with all their hearts, the least we could do is to let each prove their worth before allowing our stereotypes get into gear.
For in this world, hatred never cease by hatred; hatred cease only with love. This is the Eternal Law. -Dhammapada- minx wrote at9:44 PM
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1 replies
Friday, August 10, 2007 11:35 PM
pfft, look here!
I sat in the blue plastic seat at the back with iPod earphones stuffed in both ears while I stared into the distance. My glance never faltered although the old uncle next to me kept going "Boom!" in anticipation of a collision between motorcycles, a MiniCooper and the bus. He kept yawning and this I know because his hands kept flying to his face to cover his open mouth.
The two pairs of lovebirds in the front were being extra affectionate; whispering sweet nothings while leaning on each other's shoulder, she doodled private jokes in Sanskrit alphabets on his hand while he looked on adoringly. That was as much as I could take in of the teenage couples because my gaze held more important things that were outside, in the distance.
I just could not look away. I felt if I looked away, I would lose it and it will never return again. Or I'll never be able to find it. So my eyes soaked in every little bit of it. It seared and hurt, causing people to look like orange and yellow blobs depending on where they were. I got dizzy and yet I stared. This was one subject that never hid at the prospect of being stared at instead it challenged a stare down.
I wasn't about to back down. I must have seemed like the most conceited commuter on the bus today. It was after all the most interesting thing to do in that span of time anyway. I stared until it backed away into the horizon leaving tinges of beautiful orange, red and purple in between clouds. Yes, I had a stare down with the sun and I won. *beams*
If you didn't already know, I have an undying love affair with the rain but today it was as if I was addicted to the sun. The sandwich lunch was had in the park as it is usually had but I stayed longer. In fact it was too long that it was late when I went back. I sneaked in with my face all flushed and my hair in a mess thanks to the sweet winds. One or two of them colleagues noticed and flashed me a smile. =)
I must admit the sun was a seducing company.
Did you look at the sky today?
The two pairs of lovebirds in the front were being extra affectionate; whispering sweet nothings while leaning on each other's shoulder, she doodled private jokes in Sanskrit alphabets on his hand while he looked on adoringly. That was as much as I could take in of the teenage couples because my gaze held more important things that were outside, in the distance.
I just could not look away. I felt if I looked away, I would lose it and it will never return again. Or I'll never be able to find it. So my eyes soaked in every little bit of it. It seared and hurt, causing people to look like orange and yellow blobs depending on where they were. I got dizzy and yet I stared. This was one subject that never hid at the prospect of being stared at instead it challenged a stare down.
I wasn't about to back down. I must have seemed like the most conceited commuter on the bus today. It was after all the most interesting thing to do in that span of time anyway. I stared until it backed away into the horizon leaving tinges of beautiful orange, red and purple in between clouds. Yes, I had a stare down with the sun and I won. *beams*
If you didn't already know, I have an undying love affair with the rain but today it was as if I was addicted to the sun. The sandwich lunch was had in the park as it is usually had but I stayed longer. In fact it was too long that it was late when I went back. I sneaked in with my face all flushed and my hair in a mess thanks to the sweet winds. One or two of them colleagues noticed and flashed me a smile. =)I must admit the sun was a seducing company.
Did you look at the sky today? minx wrote at11:35 PM
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3 replies
Wednesday, August 08, 2007 10:52 PM
put on your toey-woey-wiggly socks and slide with me.
My heart, it's bothered. My brain, it's semi-dead. My door, it's locked.
That problem is still a problem.
Those thoughts still cloud you and hampers with your will power.
You sigh in frustration, I sigh in misery. But that peace we felt in the dead of the car with swaying leaves and cheeky street lights must be real 'cause my heart is a tad lighter.
It's true, I go hysterical when the blues hit.
For now, I'm that coward who chooses to stay behind this locked door in the dark of the room to delay dealing.
It's not defeat I'm accepting but that I need some happyclappygocrazy moments for now.
I'll be strong for you once the keys turn in this door. I promise.
Edit: I can't do those tags. I procrastinated and now there's too many. Eeks!
That problem is still a problem.
Those thoughts still cloud you and hampers with your will power.
You sigh in frustration, I sigh in misery. But that peace we felt in the dead of the car with swaying leaves and cheeky street lights must be real 'cause my heart is a tad lighter.
It's true, I go hysterical when the blues hit.
For now, I'm that coward who chooses to stay behind this locked door in the dark of the room to delay dealing.
It's not defeat I'm accepting but that I need some happyclappygocrazy moments for now.
I'll be strong for you once the keys turn in this door. I promise.
Edit: I can't do those tags. I procrastinated and now there's too many. Eeks!
minx wrote at10:52 PM
2 replies
2 replies
Tuesday, August 07, 2007 9:02 PM
she's all i'll ever want.
It was a dark compartment with plush high seats. From the outside, it looked like all of us could fit. How many of us again? I forget. But many is all I know. High-pitched laughter, hiccups, rambles - it went in that order the whole time. People were swaying everywhere but I stood my ground. All that was different was my vision. Everything was a blurry haze of gray.
I could hear you, talk to you but I could barely see you. I think it was you because you never stopped talking. You never stopped telling me about the both of them. Your voice rang through like the announcements in the mall except only I was tuned in to the transmission. Everyone else was deaf to it. She was right beside you and yet she was indifferent to your words of content and admiration for her. The way you grinned as she looked at you and the joy in your voice as she said that you were always the one is imprinted in my mind.
That's when I couldn't stand for it anymore and my eyes flew open. As I lay in bed hugging Elmo, I couldn't shake off the plunge I felt. Do I know you? Was that really you? Tried to shrug it off with a ah, but it was only a dream but it wouldn't let go of me.
And then I stumbled upon blog posts with titles like Clueless and Ex-ess and Platonic Love and Being a Girl Friend and I realised that my role has never changed. No complains here. In fact it is a joy to be able to hear of her subtleties and little nothings. However who can resist wondering if this invisibility cloak will ever, ever come off.
One blog has been a source of engaging thoughts and comfort. The arguments put forward have questioned more than is usually questioned. Though it's nowhere close to a solution, Confusion's hold is not as strong as it used to be as well.
I could hear you, talk to you but I could barely see you. I think it was you because you never stopped talking. You never stopped telling me about the both of them. Your voice rang through like the announcements in the mall except only I was tuned in to the transmission. Everyone else was deaf to it. She was right beside you and yet she was indifferent to your words of content and admiration for her. The way you grinned as she looked at you and the joy in your voice as she said that you were always the one is imprinted in my mind.
That's when I couldn't stand for it anymore and my eyes flew open. As I lay in bed hugging Elmo, I couldn't shake off the plunge I felt. Do I know you? Was that really you? Tried to shrug it off with a ah, but it was only a dream but it wouldn't let go of me.
And then I stumbled upon blog posts with titles like Clueless and Ex-ess and Platonic Love and Being a Girl Friend and I realised that my role has never changed. No complains here. In fact it is a joy to be able to hear of her subtleties and little nothings. However who can resist wondering if this invisibility cloak will ever, ever come off.
One blog has been a source of engaging thoughts and comfort. The arguments put forward have questioned more than is usually questioned. Though it's nowhere close to a solution, Confusion's hold is not as strong as it used to be as well.
minx wrote at9:02 PM
2 replies
2 replies