Tuesday, July 22, 2008 9:52 PM
i could run out, then come back and call it a social experiment
I was tempted to call it in. To throw my hands in the air and declare it out loud amidst the clicks of mouses and typing fingers.
It wasn't only difficult but in fact very much painful to sit there in front of the screen while it poured outside my window. The pain would have been considerably reduced if the blinds would just cooperate and stay open. For the first time in the longest time, I wished the rain would just leave to go to be with someone who needs it.
I dreaded so much how I wanted to be outside under my new umbrella.
It would have been a great walk. One that would have raindrops wet my feet and the wind dance cheekily through my hair. It would have been a walk that would have gotten me sick with happiness. But as is evident, it remains a would have been. Undeniably, it was regret and dread that came over me. At times, you could sense a hint of contempt.
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The redundancy in the task did nothing except aggravate matters. It was then, more than anytime that I desired to be alone to chew and quietly digest. But all the flurry around: can finish today?, check Information Architecture again and then go to Livelink!, come for lunch with us? made it quite impossible.
So, I declined the meal invite and instead had Explosions in the Sky over for some nasi goreng cina. The thirty minutes together alone was so much comfort. This was the first of a few blessings to come.
At clock out, I got the walk back. There was no heavy rain and no reason to flaunt the new umbrella but it was beautiful how He made Mr. Sun do extra hours just like I did. It was 7pm and there were streetlights but the sun shone a warmth so slight, it was nothing short of mesmerizing. The sky was a beautiful mix of blue, purple, gray, yellow and more. I could never do it justice with words, no one could.
Walking on familiar routes made me remember of the times my feet trudged these same paths along with other feet - the feet of ones I now miss.
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With each step, I thought of each one of you. Your silliness, your laughter and your voices and that made me smile =)
minx wrote at9:52 PM
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